Wednesday, September 28, 2022

Calliope's Musings on Spain

A woman’s prerogative

“We should enlarge that upstairs window and install French doors, to match all the other windows on the second floor.” The builder opened it up to accommodate the change. “That looks dreadful. It’s only a foot above the top of the front door. Put it back the way it was.”

It’s all in the translation

Por favor, una horca,” I ask the señora in the hardware store. She looks horrified. I make digging motions to indicate I need a garden fork. She looks relieved, and says there are none in stock. On looking up the Spanish for ‘horca’, I discover I’d asked for a gallows

Our renovations perturbed the locals

Why did we remove the brown and blue mosaic tiles and paint the wall ‘magnolia’ instead?

What’s in a name?

Big Basura Day and interior design decisions for Montejaque's Carolyn Emmett

The latest diet

In our Spanish mountain village, the new name for successful weight loss is ‘cryptosporidiosis’. In three weeks, I’ve lost 5kg. and gone down two dress sizes

The rain in Spain …

Carolyn Emmett wonders if she'd bought a dream house or a nightmare

Battle of the Bridge re-enactment in Montejaque

On Saturday and Sunday, November 10 and 11, the villagers of Montejaque will be re-enacting, for the third successive year, the drama of the Batalla de la Puente

My knickers are not wet!

Up the hill and down the dale, I walked the rocky mountain trail; I saw the plains... I’ve got the pains to prove it.

Joseph Heller is right – It’s Catch 22!

And IKEA is a four-letter word

¡Buen provecho!

The foreign residents of Montejaque give the Spanish locals a ‘taste of the world'

A picture is worth a thousand… expletives

PASS the PORT ... I need a drink! The trials and tribulations of renewing a UK passport in Spain

An Elephant no more

A new broom is sweeping clean at the soon-to-be-renamed Hotel Montejaque (formerly El Elefante Amarillo), located in the village square of this pretty pueblo blanco

Calliope/Carolyn comparison

Calliope, the eldest and most distinguished of the nine Muses. Carolyn, the second eldest and only slightly distinguished of the six Hill offspring, is constantly thinking about writing eloquent, epic or heroic prose. Carolyn Emmett - or is Calliope? - introduces herself to Olive Press web site readers

A gastronomic delight

Taste more than 50 dishes from Spain and all over the world when the village of Montejaque launches its bilingual (Spanish/English) Cookbook and Village Guide on 10 August

Back to the drawing board

A compromise was reached. Now everyone can sunbathe naked

Ernest Hemingway’s ¡Olé!

Admire the skill of the matadors or deplore the cruelty to the bulls; a first visit to a bullfight can bring out both of these emotions

Holding my head up high

Mantilla: a lace or silk shawl worn over the head and shoulders, often over a high comb. Peineta: (1) a large comb, with a convex body and set of prongs, used to hold up the mantilla; (2) when being fitted, an instrument of torture for women with short, fine hair

The Calendar Girls coming to Andalucia?

Find your favourite recipes and get ready to get your kit off! Calliope is coming to town!

Spacious three-bedroom holiday home for rent… ideal for couples?

We, along with most of our foreign friends in our Spanish mountain village, are owners of holiday homes that we rent out to walkers, bird-watchers, and sun-worshippers. And we enjoy comparing notes on the habits of our renters...

A bun-fight in Montejaque

More than 50 local and international dishes – from gazpacho to Teriyaki chicken to ‘Gypsy Arm’ – were waiting to be tasted by the villagers and tourists. The judges had just started scoring the desserts when the masses could no longer wait. Those with the longest arms got to eat the most

A backward glance

After four lessons to learn the ‘sevillana’ dance, I think I have finally mastered the steps. I’d been muddling my paso with my pasada, and turning right when I should have been turning left

The Anniversary Gift

It’s our 26th wedding anniversary. “What would you like: flowers, chocolates, jewellery?” “How about we buy a house in Spain,” he said.

Rio Carnival? It came close…

Six brawny men (three dressed as women and one in a chicken suit) won the jug-throwing contest - this was Carnaval day in Montejaque

Remember when…

South Africa to southern Spain: A moving experience for Calliope

Spanish property: A profit on paper

‘Recession’ should be a four-letter word; will we ever profit from our Spanish property investments?

The Michelin man in drag

I am wearing seven layers of clothing; I feel fat and uncomfortable; my hands are freezing

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