WITH places opening up and social restrictions being lifted slowly those people who haven’t been able to date during the pandemic will now be able to. But whilst we’re following the roadmap out of hell and hopefully have had plenty of time in our bedrooms to think about life and what we want from it, wouldn’t it be refreshing to press reset on the whole dating game?

Throughout the pandemic we’ve all spent so much time online just keeping in contact and everyone, apart from the covoids (those who appear to revel in the restrictions) are excited to be going back to the old normal. But what if people take this as an opportunity to go back even further, to the old-fashioned way of dating and appreciate the real life contact you can have instead of a virtual reality.

Now I get that meeting people on dating apps has been the norm for millennials and Gen Z, but I believe dating sites have ruined men and may well be a cause of relationships becoming increasingly difficult to establish, let alone maintain. Take Tinder, a simple swipe to the right or left is all that’s required to hook-up with someone. Dating sites are great for having your ego stroked by the steady stream of pokes or likes! Facebook is also a guilty culprit because we all know that it’s a good front for meeting new people you simply like the look of, or re-establishing contact with ‘that old friend from school’.

Tinder Home Page Pixabay Free Image
It’s all in the swipe, wooing is not needed

I am probably one of the few women I know who have never signed up to a dating site, or met someone off one. Yes, I’ve had a little nosy when friends have come around with their lap-top under one arm, a bottle of wine in the other and a heady whiff of optimism. After helping girlfriends scrutinise contenders over a bottle or two of Sancerre I’m well aware of what’s out there. It’s really not easy to try and separate the bull from the shit and don’t get me started on those pictures, you know the ones I’m referring to! Men, sending that private picture is not going to work!

But back to my point as to why I think dating sites and apps have spoiled men. They just don’t have to try anymore like they once did. Why pull a chair out for you to sit on when they can just switch seats or move quickly on to the next. Why the need for romance when Tinder promises an endless stream of quick hook-ups? Why should a man try and get to know someone over dinner when they can sit at home pouring over Facebook checking out their mate’s tidy friends online with a beer in one hand and their …. in the other? When it comes to relationships we have become a generation of ‘NEXT!’ Where has romance gone, or a man wanting to even woo a woman? Wooing is the benchmark of the amount of effort a man will go to, to get to know you in the first place.

Old fashioned dating was nice and exciting anticipating seeing someone you liked and creating those wonderful butterflies in your stomach. But those same flutter byes just don’t exist anymore because you’re judged by your profile picture and communication is via text, not talk. Meaning most men will feel bold enough to ask to see either you or them naked online and want to know your favourite sexual position before you can even say A La Carte menu!

You can follow me on Twitter and Instagram @tereniataras

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