I HAD the champers at the ready, the non-alcoholic bubbly chilling in my fridge for my kiddies.

Waiting for the magic words.

We had been promised that as of Monday April 27 children would be allowed out for a short period, beneficial for the welfare of the child (and parent).

I sat my kids around the TV, hanging off the words of government spokesperson Maria Jesus Montero:

“We are proposing that from April 27, minors aged 14 and under can accompany an adult on a trip outside of the house, such as going to the supermarket or the pharmacy.”

The mind boggled.

Kids would be allowed out to the supermarket?! The mind boggled, I’d obviously heard it wrong…

I’d obviously heard it wrong, I grabbed the TV remote to see if I could activate a replay and attempt a second translation.

But out of the corner of my eye I glimpsed my 11-year-old looking at me in astonishment, tears wavering out of the corner of his eyes.

Five and a half weeks of strict lockdown and he had just been told by a government official that his ‘freedom’ would now comprise going to do the weekly shopping.

For the life of me I could not understand how going from one indoor space to another, the latter an obstacle course of possible contaminated items and people would be beneficial for my child’s wellbeing, or mine for that matter.

There could only be four possible explanations:

1. April fools day had been delayed this year, but I hadn’t got the memo.

2. This was some mad scheme about herd immunity – get them all contaminated and somehow weaken the virus?

3. This bombshell was just a way to divert everyone’s attention away from something more outrageous that the government was trying to cover up.

4. The government, despite their team of ‘experts’ haven’t got a clue what they are doing.

It should be noted that I’m not political myself. Had the madcap scheme come from another political party, my reaction would have been the same.

After dealing with five hours of tears, foul language and heartbreak (my own I should add, my kids have been much more mature about this than I have) the government turned around an informed us that ‘They listen to the people’ and kids WILL be allowed out.

I can only conclude that it’s number 4, and they obviously have no idea what they are doing…

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